Junket Quest
by AliasOfWestgate
Summary: Updated! After a long haitus. See who's next on the solo mission. What other trouble can they run into, right? AU, OCs, comedy, and a tiny bit of foul language.
1. Setting the Stage

Many Thanks to my Beta Reader Supreme: Missheru!  Arigato Gosaimas  *bows deeply* 

She's responsible for this much better edit. 

Alias: Heya again everyone! I'm back, much sooner than I expected.. 

Arigato Gosaimas for the reviews of Aftermath. I'm still in shock of how well received that one is. ^_^ 

Gojyo:  *looking over her shoulder at new project* Chickie, you practically read my mind for that one—you reading it again? *smiles his wicked smile* 

Alias: Down boy! Maaaaaybeeeeee ^_~ heh.  *watches as the kappas face grins even wider*  

Gojyo winks back, and saunters over to the insomniac authroress' bed. Sits down and starts flipping channels on the TV. While Alias covers her own grin with a tiny hand.  

Alias: Back to business, this one is my first chaptered fic. I'm not sure if shounen-ai will show up, but it's AU..and  one major inserted character. Right now, I'm just setting the stage…*grins reminiscent of a certain bemused Deity* 

Disclaimer: All Saiyuki characters belong to Kazuya Minekura-sensei and not me.

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Junket Quest 

Chap 1: Setting the Stage 

 By AliasOfWestgate 

The Bitch had yet again chewed Kougaiji out for not retrieving the Sutra from the Sanzo-ikkou yet again. He stalked back to his mother's pillar, growling and murmuring curses to make their way to Gyokumen under his breath. Then composed himself somewhat. The rage covering his golden face smoothed, the snarl fell away, and only his red eyes remained fierce as the sunrise before a morning storm. 

As his gaze fell on his Mother, serene even in her imprisonment…he calmed down yet a bit more. The rage was still low range anger, but the demon prince could think again. Instead of a blinding rage against the Bitch that taunted him time and again, while asking for the world—and wondering why her 'stepson' couldn't acquire it for her. _Mother, this continues to go on and on. Never-ending for both me, and my prey. If there was a way to end this, before it began, I would…_

He then wandered into the humming, dank lab that Gyokumen had crammed her scientists into. 

Even Dr. Nii and the rest of the lab rats his 'stepmother' employed could not succeed. Shuddering at the sheer strangeness of that doctor.  Kougaiji wandered into the lab…_but_ _there might be something I can use here_. His gaze wandered over the constantly running supercomputers, strange instruments he had no name for, and an oddly shaped crystal that glowed from within. His hand wandered to the crystal, for it was shaped as an hourglass, humming with an odd blue glow. Upon that crystal, was the silhouette of a landmass, shaped like a hand with an even odder shaped piece of land above it. The hourglass I can understand, but this? Quietly pocketing it, and knowing most activation cantrips would set the artifact off, he strolled out of the lab without bothering it's even stranger inhabitants. 

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Yet another day with the Sanzo-ikkou. Hakkai steering and looking out for yet another town for the rowdies he 'minded' if only because it kept his mind off other things. Besides they were amusing…

"Ne, Sanzo? Are we there yet? I'm hungry……" the last word sliding into a petulant whine. 

*THWACK* 

"Ch!, we ate not even an hour ago baka saru, put a sock in it." Growled Sanzo, not quite monotone, but not into the raging temper tantrums his companions had grown used to. 

Gojyo, usually the other side of the days bickering, was asleep behind Hakkai's seat. For once bothering no one and avoiding the huge white fan that had just connected with Son Goku's skull for the 5th time this afternoon. 

The green jeep that was a dragon's alternate form quietly slowed down. For no reason either, no town, no mountains, no lake nearby. "Hakuryû, I didn't break, why did you stop?" 

The reply of "_kyuuuuuuuuuuu__!_" was given and the headlamps flashed. An incredulous look came across Hakkai's usually serene surface. He then said nothing, as was his way, then waited patiently while the others noticed the situation, and dealt with it accordingly. 

Gojyo groggily opened an eye, "Oi, saru…did you insult the other animal again?" 

"I did NOT hentai kappa! You probably tired him out with your snoring!" the boyish one replied with a wicked grin on his face. 

"Eh, I'm not the one that snores like a passing thunderstorm, chibi saru." Gojyo lazily smiled as he warmed into the argument. Pulling a pack of Marlboro cigarettes and a lighter out of his pants pocket, he lit one while still reclined in his favorite spot in the jeep. 

Sanzo was watching ahead of them, even though they had stopped. He'd noticed an aura around them again, not youkai this time. One that irritated him beyond all reason, he knew _that_ aura. Sounds of the usual heated bickering between the younger members of his party had escalated; intruding on the monk's reconnoiter of the area. Veins beginning to pop up on his porcelain forehead, he turned around, drew the Banishing Gun, stabbed it's steel muzzle to Gojyo's temple. 

"**Urusei**! Both of you! The one personage I don't want to see is approaching, I _DON'T _need you two sniping to add to the humiliation.!!!" He screamed in ascending vocal tones, punctuated by the clicking of the gun itself, as he cocked it. 

Gojyo's face fell, and sweat dropped at the sound of that Gun. Goku snickered in glee, for he wasn't the target—at least not yet anyway. 

Hakkai was about to do his usual routine of interrupting before someone got killed when……….

"YO! ^_~ " Kozeon purred as he manifested in front of his favorite amusement while in Tenkai. _Now this should be interesting, He smirked to herself. Not quite the usual mission, but close enough to be no never mind. Let's so how this ragtag thing called a 'party' handles it. Even though they won't be a party, for each step. Oooo this will be so much FUN! _

"Hh, and what are you here for this time?" Was Sanzo's immediate reply. Turning his face away from the Avatar in insolence. Hiding the Banishing Gun in the folds of his layered robes. 

"Hakkai, why didn't you say anything?" Gojyo's voice drifted from the back of Hakuryû. 

"Yeah, Hakkai? Why didn't you?" Goku echoed the kappa. 

Hakkai managed a sheepish look while saying "Gomen, minna-san… I was bored?" 

"Actually time has everything to do with it, time and another continent" he smirked once again. This comment brought a group "_NANI?_" Four pairs of eyes locked on him, which was his intent from the start. 

"Your rivals for the possession of the sutras have managed to transport themselves to a place where they can't get away. Their illustrious leader managed to get them further west than even YOU boys are traveling. Little further in time as well…" He ended the last statement with a giggle. The Sanzo-ikkou eyed him warily. When he was this happy about something, it never meant well for them. "Of course things wont' go wrong while they are there, but things are out of balance here. So for now, I'm nominating you four to retrieve them. This includes the time travel, space as well—and I'll even include a guide!" 

Both Hakkai and Gojyo managed to grab Sanzo before he attempted to strangle the Deity where he stood, which was right in front of Sanzo's seat in the jeep. 

"Maa, maa! Sanzo…it won't do any good, you know that by now' with a death grip around Sanzo's waist. 

Gojyo hung on for dear life and said nothing as the ill behaved priest cursed the kami of mercy for nearly 5 minutes straight. Finally the monk's tantrum subsided, or at least the homicidal aspect did. The anger never left that face, yet never marred its beauty either. 

Kozeon remained standing, hand on his hip while all this happened. 

"By the way, boys…you have to find and reach those four by yourselves each time to retrieve those four. This means solo missions! They've all gone to the same town, but in landed a few days apart. I'll take each of you to the place and time, and lead you to your guide. Then you use this to return here." He gave each man a silver ring, not even ornamented with gems or filigree. Simple, unadorned rings that fit upon the right forefinger of each of the Sanzo-ikkou. 

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To Be Continued: Chapter 2: Meeting the Guide  

Alias: You must wait a bit longer :P 

Even I'm impatient to have it get written *laughs* For now, you can settle for this much nicer looking edit.  

Ja! 

  Alias 


	2. Meeting the Guide

Alias: I'm baaaaaaack! Thanks for the good reviews one and all. 

**Ayie****: Yes you were right on who they'll get—but that's only part of the fun. **

**Missheru****:  I once again bow to your Beta Reading supremacy. Can't do this without you and you KNOW it. **

Gojyo:  Oi, girlie! Get on with it aleady! I wanna see what happens next!  

Alias: Hai hai!  With no more stalling….here it is…..

Junket Quest: chapter 2

Meeting the Guide

By AliasOfWestgate

The Sanzo-Ikkou   looked at the simple silver rings, and glared back at Kozeon again, in turns. They'd been given them, but had no clue on how to use them. Of course, the Kami of Mercy hadn't bothered to explain himself on how to use them yet.  

"Yosh! Now boys, it's easy to use it, the thing is you have to have a grip on your rival to get it to key correctly. That—and make them say 'taku' with you.  Then you'll appear back here in fairly short order." Kozeon walked around Jiip as he gave these instructions, looking at each of them in turn. 

Sanzo was still glaring at him, arms crossed and a sneer marring his face. Goku scratched his head and asked, "What do we have to say again?" There was a muffled thunk as Gojyo hit the brown haired boy on the head this time with the flat of his hand. 

"Baka saru! He said 'taku' even you can remember that one!" The crimson haired rogue grinned around his cigarette as he said this. 

"Oh, since when are we mister memory now, ero kappa!" Goku smirked. 

"Since you never remember anything except for breakfast, lunch and dinner, chibi saru." Gojyo's voice rose as he retorted. 

Before Goku could reply, a heavy white fan struck both their heads with no warning whatsoever, not even the usual scream that accompanied the action most times. Kozeon grinned again. 

"Itai!!!" came from both mouths as both Goku and Gojyo rubbed the resulting lumps on their heads. Hakkai had watched the entire exchange silently, a quiet grin on his face. He wanted to know what was next—or more likely, who was first to go on this wild tachi chase. 

"Now for the fun part, who shall I take first on this merry chase" the Kami of Mercy grinned again as his gaze fell on Hakkai.  This brought on the rare startled expression to the quiet, but deadly member of the Sanzo-Ikkou.  

"Yes, I think it's your turn to lead the way this time, ne?"  Kozeon simply clasped a beautiful hand around Hakkai's wrist and pulled him out the driver's seat. Bringing a startled "_kyuu_!"  from Jiip.  "Oh I won't leave you either, would you like to tag along this time?" 

Jiip's answer was to transform into his smaller, cuter dragon form, and fly to perch on Hakkai's shoulder—with no time for the rest of the party to scramble out. And with that, both Hakkai and the smiling Deity disappeared from sight.  

"Oi, saru get your hand off my leg! I hope that's the saru anyway..." Gojyo complained as he tried to get out of the resulting tangle of three people after Hakuryu's sudden transformation. Which did him no good as Sanzo's right hook caught him in the jaw. 

"Damn you, slanty eyed monk!" Sanzo managed to untangle himself and walked away to sulk a few feet away. He was not looking forward to waiting around with these two fools. 

_Damn you Kozeon!!! Couldn't you have picked the more annoying ones first? _His violet eyes gazed at Goku and Gojyo finally getting up off the hard dirt of the road. Goku animatedly began picking up his own backpack, and moved the packs reserved for the rest to the other side of the road. As this was being done, Gojyo found a convenient tree to lean against. The forest they'd been traveling through had shown no end, and with their transportation gone, he made himself at home, as usual. 

Goku's stomach chose that moment to growl.  "Ne, Sanzo? I'm hungry? Do we have anything to eat in these?"  Sanzo's eyebrow began to twitch as he realized it was going to be a _long _wait for Hakkai to return. 

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Hakkai gazed at their new surroundings. There had been no disturbance in the eye-blink it had taken to get here. He also looked at the girl they'd appeared in front of. At least she looked like a young girl. The air smelled of water and trees, as her wide brown eyes widened in surprise behind her oblong eyeglasses.  She was short, even shorter than Goku, he noticed, with skin more golden than Gojyo's. He smiled back automatically, hoping she wouldn't scream. _I know I would, seeing a man with a tiny dragon and what appears to be a gorgeous woman in front of me, with NO warning whatsoever.  _

"Hold on a minute? You can't be who I think you are? You're only a graphic novel and anime character. This **can't **be real!" Hakkai noticed her voice was light, but not as high pitched as he thought, coming from one so small. She stood her ground dressed in black jeans and a blue t-shirt.  

"Hello Mitsu." Purred Kozeon. "Yes we are, and right now, you are the only one that knows this area well enough to help us out on this little jaunt. I've elected you to be the Guide for him, and the others" His voice was a smooth contralto as he said these words, Mitsu's eyes narrowed. 

"What's the catch?" suspicion dripped from those words as they left the tiny girls mouth. 

"Oh nothing, just help them find the Kougaiji-tachi, preferably without too much trouble." Was the answer from the currently Very entertained Deity. "I'll even provide a way to pay for everything, here's a Three Aspects Gold Card, I'm sure you're familiar with this little thing, ne? So you don't bankrupt yourself when Goku's turn rolls around." This was said with a smile. 

Mitsu's long fingered hands grabbed the offered card out of the Bodhisattva's hand quickly at the thought of this. _Alright, this spoils my vacation time this week—then again…maybe not. I get Hakkai first? _Drawing on her knowledge of the man standing before her, which was only the from manga and anime she laughed at in the company of her few friends. _  OH man are the idiots that call themselves pretty are gonna go wild seeing ME, the nerdy anime nut in the company of this cutie! Heh.  Yeah, this will be fun, mostly to see their faces. Heh! _

"Alright Kozeon, I'll do it. Now how the _HELL _are we supposed to find them?" Mitsu moved her thick, brown hair out of her eyes as this was said. 

"Easy! ^_~ Hakkai, your ring will warm up the closer you get to your target, who happens to be Yaone. She volunteered to go first on this little foray. Now I've provided any necessary items for you that might be feasibly needed here. Mitsu I'm sure you know what I mean. Papers and such, just look in your car! Everything else is up to you dear girl." And with that, the Kami of Mercy disappeared, leaving the two people in the giant shadow of a swan. 

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"Damn it…oh well. I guess I should say 'hi' now, after all that grumping. Gomen! " Mitsu smiled at Hakkai as she bowed, her wide lips framing small teeth, with a wide gap in the front two.  

"Ah...I know the feeling, Mitsu. Kozeon has a tendency to do this to all of us." Hakkai replied and returned the gesture. 

With that, Mitsu walked over to her car, which was a blue Geo Metro…tiny, blue and slightly battered along the sides. During the entire exchange they had been in a lakeside parking lot, which amazingly for midsummer Michigan—had no other patrons. Mitsu beckoned Hakkai over as she unlocked her passenger door, and stuffed the Three Aspects Card into her small black purse. He got into the car as she turned on the radio to a station, and sat back in her seat. 

"Okay, now that that's out of the way… we need to think of where she might be. Got any ideas? Her long arms behind her head, as the car's open windows let the lake winds mess with her hair. "Actually, you can do that as we get back to my house. I need to pick up a few things. This might get messy, if I remember correctly, you don't go anywhere without trouble too far behind. Even if this is only to find someone, I'd rather be ready for anything." She quietly sat up, turned the key and the 3-cylinder engine started up. 

The drove a few miles up the road, which was mostly large leafy trees, interspersed with some affluent two-story homes. Most of them look the same as any middle class neighborhood in Michigan. The general colors were white, grey, occasionally a brown would show up in the monotony that was Lakeshore Rd in this tiny town. Eventually she pulled into the driveway of a small one story white house, and hopped out of the car, black purse in hand. "I'll be right back; I just need one or two things." She said with a grin again as waved with her other hand. 

Hakkai put his head on his hand and looked around him. There was a large green-eyed cat lounging in one of the windows, with silky black fur and a white star on its chest. His gaze wandered to an empty lot next door, there was a huge red truck there, and three times as big as the current vehicle he was sitting in. Curiosity getting the better of him, he wanted to see this vehicle. He quietly got out of the little car, and walked over to the 4X4. Looked back, and wondered how much faster they could get around in this beastly huge thing. Grin widening when he noticed the owner had left the keys in the car as well. It was even stick shift! Hakkai had no love for automatic transmissions, if he was driving. "You thinking the same as I am, Jiip?" He asked dragon upon his shoulder. Jiip nodded without a sound, and smiled. 

His slim form made no sound as he opened the unlocked door into the truck and slid into the driver's seat. Green eyes widening in delight as he started it up. Jiip's little wings flapped as he perched behind him on the large seat. 

Mitsu was just on her way out of the house when she saw where her guest had gone. Gripping a rapier in her left hand, and shouldering backpack of her own she raced over to the truck. 

"Hakkai! Oh no! Don't tell me you like this thing?" as she opened the passenger door. 

"Hai! Miss, you don't mind if I drive for the rest of this little side trip?" He got a pleading look in his forest green eyes that Mitsu immediately suspected—but couldn't resist. It was her idiot brother's monster anyway, seeing what Hakkai would do with it would be even more fun. Considering all her brother did with it was pick up girls and get arrested for speeding. 

"Alright, you can drive…it's my younger brother's truck anyway. His fault he left the keys in it!" Mitsu grinned viciously. "Now give me one more minute, I'm gonna grab those papers that Kozeon told me about." She left the 3-foot blade on the passenger seat, with her backpack as she raced back to the Geo, tossed open the passenger door and grabbed all that had been said out of the glove compartment. She found a passport, a Michigan driver's license and a few others she didn't have time to look at as she stuffed them into her arms and rushed back to the truck. 

Mitsu grinned again as she crammed all the papers into her blue backpack, found a better hiding place for the rapier, and grabbed onto the 'Oh Shit' bars as Hakkai backed out of the parking lot and onto the road… _Let the fun begin!!!! _ She thought as he backed out of her small parking lot, and shifted gears again and gunned it into town. 

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To Be Continued: Chapter 3 (untitled as of yet) 

Alias: That's chapter two…enjoy! 

Gojyo: Hey I'm not in this one! Did you have to leave me with that lousy monk? 

Alias: No yer not, kappa, but you will get more time.  I guarantee it! *glomps him* 

Hakkai falls over laughing in the background. 

Alias: Ja Na! ^_^   

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	3. WTF

Alias: Hello everyone! ^_^ Here's chapter 3…enjoy!

UltraM2000: My beta reader Missheru uses the actual kanji basis for the spelling of Kozeon, she insists that Kanzeon is Kozeon (there is no ん), and so I use that. Instead of the more popular version, which is Kanzeon. If you have a beef with it, take it up with her. Believe me; I don't cross her lightly, since I know not a whit of kanji.

Disclaimer: All Gensomaden Saiyuki Characters are the property of Kazuya Minekura-sensei and not me. If I did own 'em I'd not be in college. Heh 

Chapter 3: WTF?

By AliasOfWestgate

Mitsu clung to the "oh shit" bar with all her strength. Hakkai continued to drive with his polite smile never wavering. Police sirens were becoming clearer and finally Mitsu could see them behind her as she glanced behind them. She frowned. It probably wasn't even Hakkai's terrible city driving that drew them here. Hakkai was an excellent driver compared to some of the hot shots that wandered the roads in this little town. Her brother probably reported the truck stolen. It would be the kind of thing the brat would have done before asking if anyone in the family had borrowed it for something.

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Kozeon watched laughing in Tenkai. Finally the laughter subsided, and he decided it was about time to give Mitsu another to try to keep under control. He returned to where he left the other three. Sanzo was sitting in the shade looking particularly disgruntled. "Where are the other two?"

"What other two?" the monk sneered back.

"Gojyo and Goku. Which other two would there be?"

"They have been-- enlightened." He said as he took a drag from his ragged cigarette. Sanzo's eyes shifted to the sight not too far away from him…two slumped bodies on the other side of forested road.

The End???? WTF?

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Alias: GOTCHA! This isn't my true chapter, though that one IS in the works. You can thank Missheru for this evil little piece of work but if you ask her she'll deny everything. She wrote it, I proofed and embellished a bit this time. ^_^ We thought it'd be a silly little 'intermission' while I think of more fun for Hakkai to get into. *gets hit on the head by Sanzo's harisen* 

Sanzo: ばか!!! I wanted that to happen, I would have had some real peace and quiet then. So I _still _have to put up with those baka yarou? Ch!

Alias: Gomen Sanzo! That was for laughs, not for real…*grins and ducks the harisen's second strike* 

Anyway, I'm off again to think of some chaos for my little lakeside town. Hope ya enjoyed. This is more like Chapter 2.5…*beckons Gojyo out from his hiding place in the bedroom closet when the monk leaves* 

Gojyo: Cutting it close there, girlie? *sits down on the bed next to the computer, lights a cigarette* Heh, still I loved the look on his face when he found it wasn't happening. Now finish off with Hakkai already, I want my turn!

Alias: Impatient aren't we, Gojyo? You'll get your turn. *turns to her audience* Now I'll see all of ya later, I've got work to do. *turns to her evil puter and grins some more*

^_^ Ja Na!

Coming Soon: Chapter 3: Driving Me Crazy


	4. Driving Me Crazy

AliasOfWestgate: Welcome back again, this time it's no false chapter-but don't let your guard down. You'll never find when they'll appear. Missheru and I are evil like that *snickers* Thanks to all that have read so far, and keep reviewing.I really need those to help me along here. ^_^  
  
Disclaimers: All Gensomaden Saiyuki characters belong to Kazuya Minekura and not me; if they did I'd not be in college, ne?  
  
Junket Quest: Chapter 4  
Driving Me Crazy  
By AliasOfWestgate  
  
Jiip hung his head out the window and smiled. Much like dogs, the little dragon that could change into a battered old jeep when needed enjoyed speeding. Hakkai smiled as other drivers went by with puzzled looks, trying to figure out exactly WHAT it was that was enjoying itself. That'd entertain him alone if there wasn't a more pressing mission to finish.  
  
He grinned, gunned the gas pedal again as the traffic light changed to green. He'd taken a bit of time to get used to those, as Mitsu had pointed out, they didn't need to get the authorities on their case--yet. Gazing over at the smiling young girl, he'd found out she was older than she actually looked with more than enough knowledge of the surrounding town they were driving through and it's sister city across the river. The lake itself spreading out on their left side was an eyeful on it's own. He'd never seen anything so vast in a long time. The most amusing thing was the water was fresh! He smiled again at the thought of Goku's first reaction to a lake so wide. He'd not warn his guide, he had a feeling she could guess at that, even if she wasn't fully aware of how much she had to handle when Son Goku's turn to chase down a member of the Kougaiji-tachi arrived.  
  
His own silver ring hadn't grown warm yet. Not a tingle from it since they'd begun wandering the roads and occasionally terrorizing those who chose to tailgate him. Such a fun world, where he could drive as nastily as he wanted now and then. Driving an endless path with no real traffic did get very boring.  
  
"Hakkai, we need to get more into town you know. We've not passed the older parts of this place yet, and it's the last place we have to look. Make a right just up here." Mitsu quietly reminded him, and pointed the way there. "This is one of the side roads, should work out just fine." She lounged back in her seat again, and slim fingers gave Jiip a quick scratch on his neck, earning a happy 'kyuuu!' from his companion.  
  
They drove by yet more houses; all cut from the same basic cloth, just facing the river and mouth of the lake he was still amazed at. Soon more civilization began to appear, and yet more of the annoying traffic lights, but he obeyed them, for now. He paused at a stop sign this time, to think of where to change direction. He made a right, bypassing a cemetery while going slightly uphill on a very shoddy paved road. All three of them held on as they bumped across the worst part, and stopped very quickly at the next light. He made a left, into traffic as the light changed, Hakkai's face unchanged as he concentrated on the ring's understated clues. Mitsu herself frowned as he'd turned them back into more populated area again. They began passing the downtown buildings quietly.a mixture of old and new buildings. It didn't quite look as good as it's designers probably thought it did. As they passed by one of the larger glass covered modern buildings, the ring began to warm up, not quite burning hot. But enough to catch the forest green eyed man's attention. "Mitsu, what is that place?" he asked.  
  
"Oh that? It's an office building with a restaurant on the top floor.quite a swanky one too." She grinned as she thought of the snobby place. "Why do you ask?"  
  
"Ano, it seems to be the place we seek" Hakkai replied with a smile of his own. "Yaone would end up working in a restaurant again. It seems to be the one place she can disguise herself well. Even here, in this world."  
  
"Then this Three Aspects card is about to get a workout, Hakkai! We'll need to dress appropriately to even sit down in there." Mitsu grinned impishly. She had a very devious mind, and it entailed dragging Hakkai to the local mall to get fitted and buy a tuxedo. "Now turn around, we'll need to get those duds now."  
  
Hakkai turned a very hasty U-turn in the midst of traffic, nearly clipping an idiot cruising in a red mustang in the rear end. This also encouraged quite a honking of horns and quite a few middle fingers extended from some SUVs and smaller vehicles than the Dodge 4X4 that he'd just maneuvered back towards the suburbs, and their tiny shopping district.  
  
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Sanzo was about to lose his mind. Finger twitching on the trigger of the Banishing Gun, he couldn't decide who he wanted to shoot first Gojyo, or the saru? Both of them were being equally annoying. Mostly cause Gojyo was cheating on cards again and the genki boy would have none of it. The problem was, Gojyo cheated even more, because he knew the stupid kid's reaction would be anger. Sanzo was leaning against a nearby tree as he trained the Smith & Wesson on first one, then the other offender.  
  
"That's the 5th time in the last hour you've cheated ero kappa! Would you ever play fair? EVER?" Goku was nearly screaming the last word.  
  
The kappa himself was smirking around a hi-lite cigarette that was nearly finished. "The day you can cheat and win against me, baka saru, will be the day I start playing fair." This brought on the predictable screaming match between the two most childish members of the Sanzo-ikkou. The Banishing Gun discharged right between the two of them twice, missing both of their bodies-but destroying the card deck. That is, the cards in the discard pile between the two bickering "boys".  
  
"URUSEI! For once in your lives just SHUT UP!!! I'll kill both of you right now if you don't shut your mouths and be quiet for a couple of hours. I'm tired of your quarreling; it offends my ears in the worst way." This tirade had started full blast, with operatic scale notes reached, and descended to the ill mannered monk's most dangerous monotone by the final two words. Both Gojyo and Goku scrambled for cover and promptly did as ordered when they heard that final note in Sanzo's voice.  
  
Gojyo wondered how he was going to live through the next few hours until Genjo Sanzo calmed down again-and hoped to the gods that Hakkai's extended leave wouldn't be for a few days, instead of a matter of hours. For now he was going to hide in this huge tree not too far from the campsite. Lighting up yet another cigarette, he settled down to wait out the lousy monk's temper tantrum. Meanwhile, Goku had found a similar tree in the other direction, and wisely decided that being quiet was better than tweaking his friend's temper again.  
  
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Entering the mall was quiet an experience for Mitsu, since Jiip chose that moment to launch from Hakkai's shoulder and flit about in the high ceilings. This drew looks from a lot of the other nameless customers, particularly when the little white dragon began cooing happily from the air. Hakkai smiled again, and looked to Mitsu who was walking ahead of him. She was impatiently digging around in her tiny black purse, trying to track down exactly where she's stuffed the Three Aspects ATM card in such haste earlier.  
  
"Ah HA! There's the little brat!" and brandished said piece of plastic. "Now it's just over here, I stayed close to the entrance nearest it. The rent-a-cops are idiots in here, but let's keep our heads down for now. Fittings first, then we eat. I don't know about you but I'm starving."  
  
They went to the PM Tuxedo rental shop, which was only a few hundred yards from the entrance they'd used. "How can I help you, today?" was the standard answer from the pretty blonde female clerk. Her blue eyes brightened at Hakkai's bland smile in return.  
  
"Ahem" Mitsu cleared her throat and got the clerk's attention. "We'll need a formal tux for my friend here, altered as soon as possible. Need it, tonight, not tomorrow."  
  
The clerk answered in a slightly more nasal voice than the one she used with Hakkai. "Well, that'll cost twice as much you know. May I ask why it's needed so soon?"  
  
"No you may not. Just finish the work." Was the answer from the tiny gold skinned woman. "Hey Hakkai? What color do you think you'd like? I've got a few ideas, but I need to get my dress before we eat. Hunger does not a happy girl make right now either." Her stomach chose that moment to growl- loudly. She rolled her eyes and grinned at the sound. Hakkai had gone up to the display; he made no sound as he walked among the mannequins displaying various styles. His gaze settled on a fairly standard tuxedo, no tails or flourishes, just a green cummerbund that was already very close to the green of his tunic.  
  
"Miss, I think this one will do." He said in his typical polite manner.  
  
"If you would just follow me, we can get that altered for you." The blonde clerk pointed to the fitting rooms over to the right. Mitsu followed them in; she was holding the ATM card of the gods after all. The tinier girl was exasperated by this type of person to no end, she had a feeling the food would lighten her mood somewhat. Genki customer service people.just GAG me already. She sighed and followed them in.  
  
Hakkai had finished putting on the suit, and was in front of the 3 mirrors used when making any markings for minor alterations. Mitsu had a bemused smile on her face that quickly turned into a giggling fit when Jiip chose that moment to alight on Hakkai's shoulder and wrap his tail around his friend's neck. The clerk looked up from the pant legs she was pinning up for the seamstress and her eyes widened. Sputtering was all that came out of her mouth when Jiip's "kyuu?" and tilt of the head greeted her. Blonde head was shaken in confusion and she finished her job quickly. Hakkai changed back into his street clothes, while Mitsu finished the transaction to pay for the suit.  
  
"We'll be back for it in about an hour." Mitsu said while still nearly laughing. The clerk finished everything woodenly.still trying to process what she'd seen.  
  
The next stop was a large Sears annex on the other side of the shopping mall. There was a midsized section full of formals, all very nice. But not suited to Mitsu's tastes. She passed over party length, too frilly types. Oh ACK. Who would wear that concoction of frill and pink? She mused while browsing the packed displays of dresses. Hakkai and Jiip simply waited, he knew well enough not to bother a girl when she was choosing something. Mitsu eventually settled on a simple black dress, with an empire waist and lightly frilled white shoulders. There were fewer arguments this time as once again, as the clerk saw Jiip on Hakkai's shoulder, the brain shut down and tried to process the fact that a tiny white dragon was sitting on the young man's shoulder. This brought a snicker from both as the transaction was completed and they searched out a restaurant to eat.  
  
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To Be Continued.Chapter 5: Untitled  
  
Gojyo: Heeeey! It's STILL not my turn, girlie. Granted, it's fun watching Hakkai do all this now get on with it! *Points to computer and idle keyboard*  
  
Alias: Sorry, got more plans for you boy, and not just this fanfic ^_~. Gojyo: eeeeeh! *Sweatdrops* Sounds like fun, maybe I'll wait a bit longer- for now. Alias: Hope you enjoyed it, and be ready for more silly stuff. *Bows-then dodges before Gojyo gooses her on the butt* Ja! 


	5. Dinner, Music and Melee

Hi everyone, it's taken forever to get this story off the ground again, but it's finally here! ^_^ 

Life is no longer quite so chaotic, so without further ado I give you Junket Quest chapter 5.

Many thanks to my Tensai Beta reader, Missheru! Particularly on dealing with my insanity while I hashed this one out. 

Disclaimers: Gensomaden Saiyuki belongs to Kazuya Minekura and not me, or I'd not be in university, ne? 

Junket Quest: Chapter 5 

Dinner, Music, and Melee

  By AliasOfWestgate 

Hakkai's mind wandered as they walked out of the mall's food court to pick up their respective formal wear for the foray into the high class restaurant later this evening. He'd noticed many a thing as he and his petite guide were eating. Mitsu ignored most of it, but he saw she did notice the looks she was given by most of the wait staff and no few of the other patrons of the public eating area.   

Studying the marked differences in the little guide and the more common look of the area, he began to see why. She was very much like Gojyo, it seemed. She was a mixture of the two types of people in the area. There was a dark skinned people, and she was a mixture of both the fairer genotype he'd seen more commonly and the lesser seen darker type. Her golden skin and blended features made her stand out. To top that off, she spoke not the darker people's dialect…but the fairer one's speech. He'd been listening and watching during most of the exchanges as they acquired their clothing. The cold looks and near ignorance of her presence wasn't just because she was a younger looking woman traveling with a handsome companion. 

"Pardon me, Mitsu…may I ask you a question?" Hakkai hedged the opening as diplomatically as he could. 

"Yeah, go ahead Hakkai. Something else you think you need before we get ready for our little shindig? Her light voice was in an idle tone, as they walked back to the tuxedo vendor they'd visited earlier. 

"No.  We need nothing else for this, I think. But…are you mixed, much like Gojyo, in this world?" his voice didn't waver, but the questioning note near the end was a bit pained. 

She chewed one of her generous looking lips, and gave an answer. 

"Yes, I am that here. Hakkai, I had a feeling you'd see that. I kinda prefer to ignore that aspect of myself, since it doesn't matter to me. We're supposed to be beyond this petty thing here, in particular this country. But it stays on. No real need to worry about it, Hakkai, it doesn't effect anything I can do here you know!" 

He noted her own slight vocal strain as she ended the statement and nodded. They picked up their formal gear and went to change in the nearest bathrooms, as it was nearing time to begin the little game to get Yaone back to Hakkai's own world and time. 

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Kozeon Boatzu grinned as he watched the players in his lotus filled scrying pool. With a wave of a bejeweled hand, the view changed to a forested road and the rest of the Sanzo-ikkou. 

The golden haired, perpetually frowning monk was sitting cross legged, back to a tree. His latest Marlboro cigarette was dog ended as he was nearly done smoking it. He looked to be dozing, and there was no squabbling from above, either. 

Sha Gojyo was firmly ensconced in the heavier branches of a tree about 20 feet south of where the monk was facing. Lanky form spilling over the heavy lower branches he'd chosen for a perch, he was sound asleep. Roughly west of Gojyo's tree, Goku was snoring loudly, curled in his own set of branches. 

The day was heavily humid, so it wasn't too surprising to the Kami of Mercy that the remaining members had gone to sleep. There was nothing better to do, not even squabbling was ideal when you were so warm that sleep seemed the best option. 

He returned the view back to Mitsu and Hakkai, to see exactly what they had planned to bring the lost apothecary back to the world He watched. 

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Hakkai had made his way out of the men's washroom, Jiip cooing happily on his shoulder again. The plain black suit fitted his slender form immaculately, and the cummerbund that matched his green eyes only made it more apparent to the ladies waiting beside the movie theater nearby in the mall that this man was dreadfully attractive. Their minds shut out the fact that there was a tiny white dragon all but purring on his shoulder, with its scaly tail wrapped around his neck. 

He'd placed his tunic, sash and jeans on the hanger that his tuxedo had rested on, and was now in his right hand, waiting to be placed outside in the large red dodge 4x4 he'd driven in to get here. Shifting the bag from hand to hand, he quietly straightened his tie and made all the smaller adjustments one makes when wearing formal clothing and its accessories, he waited for the guide to make her appearance.  

He was rewarded with the quiet sound of a light mezzo soprano voice cursing, the echoes floating out as the source of those curses walked cautiously out of the women's bathroom. Mitsu was adjusting the black and white dress's empire waist in the door way, and tossing the flat heeled dress shoes onto the floor. She had adamantly refused the suggestion of heels from the seamstress that had altered her gown. The puffy white sleeves, and tucks in the gown's high black waist highlighted the fact that she had very strong shoulders, even if her bust was small as could be. Her thick brown hair had been pulled into a simple plait that went down to her shoulders, and held in place by a dark green barrette. She had delicate stud earrings with glittering green stones, and necklace to match, both of them set in silver. Hakkai knew they were cheap costume jewelry, but Mitsu wore them as if they were real emeralds instead of glass. 

"Well, let's get this show on the road!" she smiled as she tossed her own hanger with her street clothes over her shoulder and walked up to Hakkai, who had offered his arm to her as soon as she made her entrance. She took it, and with a wide grin, they walked out the door of the shopping mall, leaving behind a sighing set of admirers of both sexes. 

It took not 20 minutes to get to their destination and night was falling as they drove across town again to make their way to The Fogcutter's parking lot. That was the name of the restaurant above the office, and Mitsu had made reservations while they were waiting for their formal wear's alterations to be completed. 

All went well as they sat down and ordered dinner, which was a delicately done grilled fish and sat down the evening's entertainment. Hakkai had spotted Yaone, dressed in a white shirt and black slacks, with her long purple hair bound into a French braid that kept it away from the food she was serving, several tables down. His silver ring was warm around his forefinger as they were close to their goal. 

The restaurant was quiet as the night progressed on. There was no real way to get Yaone's attention immediately, so both Hakkai and Mitsu lingered over the meal provided by the Sanbutshin's ATM card. It was a typical upper class meal, in that it barely filled the plate and did not fill the stomach, although it was rich enough in taste to please both diners.  There was a band playing quietly, with no upbeat songs to really improve the mood. The sound was a drowsy sonata done with a five piece ensemble. It didn't quite bore everyone, but still classy enough to please those that ignored the more "common" forms of sound. Particularly since the music was not broadcast on public radio, but played live, yet another little jibe to the fact that the restaurant was high class and not among those without the means to dine among the mahogany tables and real silver tableware.  

Yaone finally drifted near enough for Hakkai to grab her, he quickly hissed a question. "Yaone-san? Would you like to leave here?"  He asked quietly while gripping her wrist. 

"H-Hakkai-san!" she nearly squeaked when she turned around and faced him, while freeing herself from his unexpected action. 

"I would be honored to leave, but first there is something we must do. My duty requires it!" the purple haired youkai quickly bowed and clicked the bracelet on her right wrist. 

The fellow restaurant patrons looked on in awe, thinking it was another stage show as Yaone changed into her barely there battle uniform in the midst of a bright aura of light, with more than a few aspects of her covered. She gripped a long spear and prepared to do battle. 

"I must see that you do not return to our home! You are the adversary of Kougaiji-sama and I can not leave without fulfilling my promise to defeat you."  She bowed as she said this as Hakkai rose from his chair and bowed in return. 

"I humbly accept your challenge Yaone-san. But we must return to our time, we don't belong here. If I defeat you, you must return with me." Hakkai issued his own challenge.  

Mitsu watch the exchange between the ever polite rivals quietly, and began to get out of her chair. She knew enough about Hakkai's techniques to move out of the way, promptly. What neither the guide nor her guest expected, was the music by the little ensemble to grind to a screeching halt. A violin screeched, a bass violin thrummed as it was dropped to the floor with a solid thud. All the players reached over to their right hands and took off a single ring. Their ears elongated and markings appeared on their faces. Snarls began to waft through the room. 

"Youkai! Hakkai…we've got more trouble than your little duel here!" Mitsu yelled out. 

"Sou ka." Hakkai nodded but never took his eyes off Yaone as they both assumed their attack stances. Yaone had clicked her bracelet limiter at the same time her escort shed theirs and she stood in her battle uniform, spear at the ready. 

Mitsu let her body relax as she began to ready herself for what little she could do to keep them away from the main part of the battle. She couldn't do much more than keep them off Hakkai's back for a short time. She didn't have the enhanced strength to deal death to them—but she could do the small thing. The small, dark haired girl slowly slid nearer to the field of battle, and watched as most of the guests fled. This time, it wasn't dinner theater. It was real battle, with real danger. Most of the wait staff had fled as well, and a single red haired waitress was at a phone, hysterically talking to the local police as the brawl began. 

Yaone charged Hakkai with her spear, which he simply sidestepped. She crashed into a nearby table, which with her demon born strength, simply splintered. Making a quick decision, she discarded her spear. Using poisons was useless against Hakkai that she knew. The attack began with a flying kick that Hakkai blocked easily, and then turned into a flurry of blows that most could not watch. The speed of both opponents was beyond comprehension. The sounds could be heard and the movements seen as they danced across the dining room. Yaone kicked once again, than followed with a hand. Hakkai blocked both and smoothly followed through with his own counter which was usually enough to simply keep Yaone at arms length. He was fighting defensively, she was fighting to incapacitate. 

Across the room, Mitsu did the only thing she could think of to start the fight, considering she was outweighed, overpowered and out numbered. She threw the nearest chair at them, and backed off a few steps. The hardwood chair became nothing but splinters as the nearest dark haired youkai simply raised a hand and crushed it. Backing off a few more steps, Mitsu threw several in front of her again and found a more open space, literally on the tiny dance floor included in the restaurant. One of the youkai kicked a few pieces towards her, and she dodged as well as she could. One of them was big enough for her to pick up off the floor and hold before her. Waiting for the first of them to take her on. 

"Well well, little missy, do you think you're can take us on here?" the leader of the escorts sneered to the little guide. 

"That's for me to know, and you to find out" she answered, and grinned. They didn't know her abilities as of yet. 

The leader sauntered up, and tossed a lazy punch at her face. What he didn't expect was her dip underneath his fist to dodge him, as he lunged towards her, and even less the foot shoved into his knee. He fell heavily to the floor, and she used the chunky leftover piece of wood to knock him out, before he could get back up. She'd put everything into that move before the rest of the group could charge her. At least without the leader it was somewhat chaotic, but there was one less of them to come after her. 

All four of them obliged her, and charged the girl en masse. Even with the piece of wood, blocking as many tossed punches as she could she had her hands full. It was a defense game for her now, but she did hold her own. Quick enough to block most of the punches, and dodge a few kicks, as the melee wound around the floor. A few more well placed kicks of her own kept them at distance, and her nails did leave a few scratches. The chunk of wood also served as a deterrent by thwacking them as quickly as she moved. Blocking as many hits as she could with it, it was beginning to weaken. 

Hakkai began to take steps towards the fight he could hear going on behind him. He glanced quickly at Mitsu and noted she was alive, but could not kill them. Mitsu was drawing fire from him, and keeping them near enough still, to the point where if he had a chance to use his ki blasts they'd be effective. He took a chance. 

"Mitsu! DUCK!" he yelled. 

Mitsu drooped to the floor as one of the thugs  turned to see Hakkai's right  palm facing  them as he blocked another of Yaone's attacks with his left hand. Cool green energy flowed in a tight beam and obliterated the four youkai still standing. The leader was still an unconscious heap on the beige dance floor. 

The petite guide picked herself off the floor and away from the one youkai she'd been able to knock unconscious. Everyone's movement stopped as the shrill whine of police sirens drew near the doorways below

"Hakkai! That's the police; we _have _to get out of here! Getting caught and locked up is not on the menu!"

"Yaone-san! Please…we must stop this fight! If we both get caught here, there is no way we can return to our home in the past." Green eyes alert and still with his arms raised in guard stance, Hakkai once again spoke with the purple haired youkai. His tuxedo had only minor damage in the midst of the short fight. 

She quickly came to a decision that she knew she would have to explain to Kougaiji-sama later on. Remaining here without being known was one thing; being locked up in a strange world was another thing. Particularly without knowing the way home. She lowered her guard and quickly ran to Hakkai's side. 

"Hakkai-san, we will continue this another time."  Yaone said, her light soprano voice wavered slightly. Both youkai followed the guide Mitsu as she ran towards the narrow hallway leading to The Fogcutter's elevator entryway. Hakkai had a quick glance at the wide blue lake spread before him, just before all three ducked into the stairwell. The cops had just taken the elevator to find the wreck of the room left over from the brawl and the single youkai still a heap on the tiled dance floor. One of the officers managed to see a large red pickup truck peel out of the parking lot recklessly. That same officer took off and ran to his own car in pursuit. . 

Hakkai was driving as only he could, gas pedal to the floor and hands plastered to the wheel.  Mitsu hung on for dear life as he swerved and ran many a stop light, Yaone was leery of actually getting into the vehicle so she'd ended up riding the open trunk of the large truck. She was holding onto her perch just as tightly, standing up with her ponytails flying. Jiip was inside where he'd stayed out of sight for their work inside the restaurant. His talons gripped the back of the seat to the right of Hakkai, as his friend drove erratically through town. A police siren blaring in pursuit behind them. 

Everyone held on for dear life as the truck swerved erratically and ran no end of stop lights. Clinging grimly to the bars by the passenger seat, Mitsu hoped they'd stop soon. She'd been in one or two fast cars, but this was crazy—even for her. 

Hakkai's driving took them nearly out of town near to Mitsu's house again. 

"Everyone, get out of the truck now!" he yelled as he was opening his door. 

Mitsu had shouldered her backpack, which also had her street clothes, grabbed her rapier and shed her shoes. Then she reached a small hand out and helped the taller Yaone out of the truck bed. 

Hakkai was already outside the truck, and Jiip had transformed into the familiar battered green jeep. He beckoned everyone inside. The girls didn't think twice and quickly jumped in. Hakkai took them off road with out a word and began to find the quickest way down to the lakeshore. Yaone was in the front passenger side with Hakkai, and Mitsu had jumped in the back. Yaone glanced back, noting the police pursuit had stopped since they couldn't follow the rocky ground where Hakkai had steered Jiip. 

They had followed the part of the shore near the bridges where the ground was between sand and stone. The police vehicle was stuck up on the pavement with no chance to follow. The lone officer was trying to follow them on foot, but couldn't keep up. He stopped and started radioing for help.  

They were another mile or two up the road before Hakkai finally slowed Jiip to a stop. Everyone got out of the vehicle before he asked him to transform again. Jiip did in a quiet white light and rested on Hakkai's shoulder again, with a quiet "kyuuu!" as he landed. The little dragon nuzzled his caretaker and turned with him to the girls. 

"Mitsu, I thank you for your guidance, perhaps the next member of our party will be a little less rushed about his departure." The green eyed man's grin was genuine as he said the last few words. 

The dark haired girl grinned widely in return and shrugged.  "It was a blast Hakkai, there's not much more to be said for this little detour. We also got to make a mess of the swankiest restaurant in town! I won't be forgetting that one anytime soon." She returned. 

"Yaone-san, it's time to return. This is fairly simple, ne? Just hold onto my hand, and say _taku _with me. That's all." He held out his right hand with the simple silver band on it. 

The purple haired apothecary nodded and held her own slim white hand out to Hakkai's and grasped it firmly. Hakkai's light voice and Yaone's higher soprano blended as they quietly said the keyword. 

They began to fade from Mitsu's sight nearly as fast as Hakkai had appeared the first time with Kozeon himself. Hakkai smiled and waved with his free hand, Jiip chirped one last time, and Yaone was smiling as they both faded away back to their own time and place. 

Mitsu smiled to herself, hefted her backpack and hiked to one of the nearest lakeside changing houses. It wasn't that far into beach season, so most of them were unlocked. She quickly changed into her jeans and t shirt again, and undid her hair from the plait the cops had seen. She replaced her glasses, she quietly buried her rapier and slid sand over the spot and sat down to read by the beach. It was a Discworld novel that the cops found her reading as they finally caught up with her. 

"Miss, have you seen anyone drive by here in an old jeep?" A rusty haired cop asked her as she looked up from her book. 

"Nope, I haven't seen anything of the like officer. I've only been here for a half hour." She answered truthfully from her seat in the sand, as she held a flashlight to read with. 

Though she was unique looking, the cops had been looking for a dark haired girl in a formal dress, and hadn't been able to see the details of her face during the chase. Bespectacled and reading in a cloud of brown hair, they had no way of telling that she was the same girl. That's the way they left her and trudged all the way back to their cars, nearly 3 miles back in the other direction. 

She gave them another half hour to make sure they were well and truly gone, dug up her rapier. Carried everything back with her on a short mile's walk, back to her house. Mitsu burst out laughing later that night. At the press junket mentioning a fight at the Fogcutter Restaurant with one suspect apprehended and her brother's big truck impounded, on the 10'o clock news. Still laughing, the dark haired girl rubbed her black cat's ears and received another purr. 

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Kozeon glanced down in his lotus filled scrying pool, as Hakkai and Yaone reappeared in front of the remaining Sanzo-ikkou. The quiet driver was promptly tackled by Goku out of the nearest tree, as Gojyo jumped down out of his own tree across the way and was doing nothing but grinning widely at his best friend's return. Sanzo's greeting was marked by nothing but "Hn" as he smoked his cigarette while leaning against his tree. 

Kozeon banished the scene with a wave of her hand and smiled serenely. 

To be continued……

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Owari ^_~ 

Hope you enjoyed it folks! I shouldn't be quite so long with Chapter 6, this time. Then we'll see who the next member of the Sanzo-ikkou  will be, that causes a little bit of chaos in the great lakes. 

Ja masta ne, 

 Alias 


	6. Never Look in a Girl's Purse

**Alias**: Yosh! Not so long a wait this time, ne? *grins* 

Disclaimer: All GS Saiyuki characters belong to Kazyua Minekura-sensei and not me, or I'd not be in university, ne? 

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**Never Look into a Girl's Purse**. 

 By AliasOfWestgate

Hakkai sat at the base of a near by tree now realizing he still had a backpack slung over his shoulder.  He smiled thinking how silly of him to have forgotten it in their hurry.  It was an older bag that looked to have survived a few wars already but still good as a new one.  He was going to leave it closed and send it with whoever was sent to her world next but then the saru appeared.  "Oi Hakkai what's that?"

            "Mitsu's bag.  I seem to have brought it here with me."

            "What's in it?"

            "Goku, it would be rude to search her bag."

            "Hakkai, I wanna see some stuff from that world.  One look couldn't hurt.  I'll be careful with whatever is in there.  I promise.  Please."  Goku was big eyed and pleading, as if for a freshly baked nikuman.  

            "I guess if we are careful one look wouldn't hurt." He sighed quietly. 

            The driver opened the flap that covered the opening to the pack.  The first thing and most obvious was a thick, soft covered book.  He slowly pulled the book out with great care for the thin paper of the pages and cover.  As the cover became visible Goku exclaimed, "Hey, that's us!"

Hakkai nodded opening the book as if it could fall apart in his hands.  His eyes went wide as he shut the book at a near slamming speed.  Gojyo looked up at the sound and investigated, then snatched the book from Hakkai's hands, as the green eyed man was still in mild disorientation.  The kappa gazed into it and proceeded to blush to the tips of his ears.  Goku had started looking at the book around Gojyo's shoulder to read, but was thwarted when the kappa stood up, holding the book above his head. Goku started jumping for the book which the kappa now held above his reach.  "This is not a book for children." The red haired hanyou taunted around his ragged cigarette. Goku's cries of "Lemme see! Lemme see!" rang through the forest as he leaped around the kappa. 

Sanzo's tolerance for noise had reached its end. The noise level abruptly went down as the surly monk took the book from Gojyo.  Ending any and all protests with the gun aimed point blank in Gojyo's face.  Gojyo surrendered, hands to the air valuing his life more than the book. Sanzo awkwardly opened the large volume with one hand still holding the gun to Gojyo's face.  His droopy lavender eyes went wide.  He threw the book to the ground and discharged two rounds into it wishing the book death. The book became a smoldering heap, quietly burning on the forest floor. 

             "Ano, we probably should have returned that." Hakkai reminded Sanzo from his spot at the foot of the tree.  

            Sanzo let out a grunt and returned to his spot away from the racket, as the two noisier members had remembered there was more inside the backpack.  Gojyo was now digging happily through the bag.  "Hey saru look they turned you plastic!" Gojyo's voice was insufferably smug as he said this. He held out a tiny strap with a tiny plastic version of Goku dangling off it.  "That isn't me it just _looks _like me, what else is in there?" was his retort as they pawed through more of the unknown contents. 

            "Ano, please Mitsu will probably like what is left of her things back." Hakkai pleaded, but knew his words fell on deaf ears.  He gave up, and leaned against the tree, mind still slightly broken from the contents of the book he had just read.

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Owari ^_~ 

**Alias**: HEH. *grins wickedly* I toldja to watch out again, didn't I? This particular piece of evilness was brought to you by **Missheru (**prod and she'll deny everything) and not me. I embellished, she provided the words. Yes, I betaed for this little "omake' once again. 

Now this interlude was brought along to remind you that I'm working on the real chap 6(now chap 7) and it will be about soon. For now, have a bit of fun. I'll be back later folks, with the goods! 

Ja ne, 

     Alias   


	7. Beaches, Breakdown and a Nerf Gun?

**Alias**: Well…Welcome back everyone. :-) Been a long time since I got this story back on the road. Life interfered hugely, to say the least. My writing style keeps changing along with it. For those still along on the ride? Many thanks for waiting so very long for this next chapter.

Thanks to Memywing for the beta job, once again. We're having too much fun with this one, ne?

The book that the Sanzo-ikkou got paralyzed by in chapter 6 is a graphic yaoi anthology featuring the Sanzo-ikkou themselves. In other words…really dirty porn. I don't own one of those—yet. Chapter 6 is another of those false chapters. Just a bit of fun inbetween installments, but not always after every installment. Mitsu kept her backpack, if you read back a bit. That was a bit of fun, just like the WTF? Chapter a few back. Enjoy them, and keep your eyes peeled for more!

By the way..i forgot to note this far back on the first chapter. _Taku _means 'home' in japanese, which is why it's the keyword for activating the talismans that get our adventurers back. That info and OC names courtesy of Memywing's meddling well. :-P

**Disclaimers: **All GS Saiyuki characters belong to Kazuya Minekura-sensei and not me. Or I'd not be in university, ne? Nerf ™ also does not belong to me, I just borrowed it for Saiyuki character harassment.

**Description: **AU, two OCs and a smidgen of foul language, making it PG-13ish.

Chap 7: **Beaches, Breakdowns, and a Nerf Gun™? **

By **AliasOfWestgate**

About an hour after Hakkai's return, the Sanzo-ikkou sat around the small fire the driver had set up just off the side of the road. He'd cooked up a quick meal to quell the cries of "Harehetta!' from a certain hungry saru after he'd returned from his jaunt to the world where the KouGaiji-tachi was trapped. He'd also packed away the formal suit he'd acquired from his rushed departure. Gojyo and Goku were happily leaning back on their elbows, fed and content. Giving Sanzo the peace and quiet he craved as he silently smoked another Marlboro, sitting cross-legged to Hakkai's right hand side.

"Hakkai, what's this world like that you had to go to? What can we expect?" Sanzo rumbled quietly.

"Anou…it's much like ours Sanzo, but not. A lot more iron vehicles, many different peoples, but the town itself that is our target, is no bigger than any of the cities we've passed through. Leave most of it to the Guide though. She knows the area inside out, and we need that knowledge."

"Oi, Hakkai…you said "she" didn't you?" Gojyo spoke up quickly.

"Hai, I did Gojyo. Our Guide is a young woman." His tone even and smile direct with his best friend, he didn't feel it was right to tell him about her lineage quite yet. .

"Really?" Gojyo leaned back onto the ground, cigarette smoldering in his mouth and gazed to the early evening sky with a sly, thoughtful look on his face.

Hakkai grinned to himself, amused that the kappa's one track mind never wavered from its favorite hobbies, one of which was admiration of women—even those he'd never met.

"Sanzo, we may have some trouble there though. That world doesn't take well to public fighting, and I got the impression from the Guide that we're in for trouble if we get caught for any small infraction. Even with anything Kozeon supplies us." He added.

"I'll note that, but considering who we're chasing after, I doubt we can avoid it at all. You _know _that, as many times as we've run up against that group." The blonde monk took another drag off his own cigarette to punctuate his last words few words and closed his eyes to think.

No other questions were asked, because in the blink of an eye, a pair of bejeweled hands wrapped Sanzo in a hug and then bodily lifted him up to his feet.

"Now Nephew…that still doesn't mean you can't enjoy your time there." Kozeon grinned from behind Sanzo.

"Get the HELL off me!" he sputtered angrily, and attempted to turn around to face the whimsical Bodhisattva to no avail. Sanzo's unearthly beauty was unmarred, even as screamed at his captor, but anger had twisted his features.

"I'll just borrow him for a little while, okay boys?" The Kami of Mercy's smile was insufferably smug as he winked to the remaining members of the Sanzo-ikkou. With that, both Sanzo and Kozeon Boatzu faded into nothingness and the next mission had begun.

It was two days later in the world across the oceans…

Sanzo landed on his butt with an audible thud. Cigarette still in his mouth, he turned around to swear at the whimsical Deity that had grabbed him away without warning. Kozeon was standing above the aggravated monk, smirking and playing lazily with the Banishing Gun.

"You old hag, that's MY gun! I need that!" he screamed, his voice rising in anger. He lunged up from the ground to reach for it, but the Kami of Mercy simply faded from view momentarily and reappeared, resulting in the priest grabbing nothing but thin air, and landing again onto the ground. His struggle to retrieve his weapon of choice had resulted in his robes becoming a dirty mess of dark soil and grass.

They had arrived beneath a large space, full of trees and sparse grass and within one hundred yards of a sandy beach and incredibly blue water that stretched beyond the eye's sight northward. The air smelled of water, but not the briny smell of salt water he'd found on other similar shores back home.

"No nephew, this item will get you in more trouble here than in your own world. I'll keep an eye on it. For now, you can rely on a few other aspects of your training to get by. Oh, and one last tip? Keep your sutra nearby, but don't count on it to work. For now, I'm off! Take good care of him, Mitsu! Ja masta na!" and the Divinity faded as he waved goodbye.

His last statement had been directed to the small gold skinned girl, who had been watching the entire exchange from a picnic table some five feet away.

"He's right you know, Sanzo. And yes, I'm your guide for the time you're here." The last was said with a mischievous grin, the last thing the now fully irritated monk wanted to see, particularly on a female face.

"Do what you want, not like I can change it." He rumbled as he noted that for all she looked younger than him, her poise showed a confidence of one close to, or above his own age.

"I'm guessing you know who you're out to retrieve." She said.

"Tch." And an eyebrow twitch was the golden haired monks only answer.

"We can stay here, Sanzo, if you'd rather lounge around in dirty robes. Or we can go and get you some better clothes to wander around in. Unless you want to tell Lirin exactly where we are, before we have a chance to find her." she turned around, picked up a paperback book, and a tiny black purse and started walking towards the mildly battered blue Geo Metro in the parking lot behind the beach. Scowling, the badly behaved monk tucked his hands into the wide sleeves of his robes and followed, his boots sliding quietly through the grass.

Mitsu unlocked her door, slid inside and unlocked the passenger door to let Sanzo inside. He sat down hard, and made no point in engaging the Guide in conversation. She shrugged, and turned on the radio as she with her previous guest. Glancing over at the monk, she knew it wasn't time to say anything. She rolled down her window, because the sunshine of the warm July day was too good to pass up, and started the car. Meanwhile, Sanzo leaned up against the passenger side armrest and sulked.

The engine revved, sputtered. Mitsu turned the key again. Another sputter, this time accompanied by a high pitched whine. One last time, the guide attempted to start her faithful little Geo. The engine turned over and suddenly quit with a noisy thunk from beneath the hood.

"SHIT!" the little guide balled up a fist and punched the steering wheel in frustration. She rummaged into her black purse for a slightly out of date cell phone. Then clicked a button, waited for it to fully activate, spoke the word Mashu into the speaker and then put it to her ear. The monk listened as she had a short conversation involving a bit of swearing regarding the vehicle they sat in and a time given for someone to arrive.

"Looks like we wait here. I'm _not _towing this thing to a garage! Luckily I know just the mad genius to do take care of this crisis." The last was said as she turned up the radio and lounged back in her seat again. Sanzo stifled a yawn of his own, and stayed put on the armrest.

Time passed slowly for him. The radio played nothing of interest to him as he dozed with his elbow on the door handle. Just before he nodded completely off, he heard the motor of another vehicle. It was a sky blue Kia Sephia, pristine and bass rumbling quietly with some obscure music that the driver had dug up on various internet hunts. It rolled to stop right next to the Metro, garnering a look from the little driver and her passenger. Mitsu hadn't rolled her window up during the wait, and she was grinning out the window and waving to the driver.

The next thing Sanzo knew, a barrage of foam darts in various colors was hitting him. The source said darts was a short strawberry blonde, wielding a large toy gun. Sanzo dodged and snarled at the annoyance as the foam darts pelted him on the head, as Mitsu had gotten the first two and then ducked, gigging hysterically.

"Mashu! I shoulda _known_ that would be the way you'd answer my hello." Mitsu choked out between giggles.

The projectiles didn't stop till the source was right beside Mitsu's open window. Behind the gun was an oval faced girl that had mild blue eyes, glinting behind her own oval wire-rimmed glasses. "What's this we have here? Mitsu-chan, you didn't tell me you had a passenger? You only said the Geo of Doom was living up to its name again. You didn't hit it again, did you?"

"No!" Mitsu laughed. "It just objected when I started it up—loudly. And I wanted to save this surprise for when you arrived. She grinned widely at her friend. "Mashu, say hello to Genjo Sanzo, who will be our guest for the day." and hitched her thumb back at the ferociously scowling monk in question.

"She hit the steering wheel when it didn't start, and I'm almost out of cigarettes." Floated imperiously from the passenger seat, as he gave a superficial nod of acquaintance to the new arrival.

"Mitsu-chan! So that's what you were up to all day Monday, wasn't it?" Mashu asked, without skipping a beat, after she returned the nod from the golden haired monk with wave of her hand.

"Yup, I was escorting Hakkai around in search of Yaone that day. You know that arrest at the Fogcutter? That was the result of that little trip." Mitsu replied. "Now we need the Geo to function again, so we can track down Lirin today. I'll tell you the rest of that one while we work." The brown haired guide reached down below her steering while and popped the hood on the car in question, as she said her final few words.

With that, she stepped out of the car, closing the door behind her. Walking around to the front of the car while still filling in Mashu of Monday's little fiasco, the hood was lifted up. Sanzo listened to sound of them as they worked, Mitsu's softer contralto narration and Mashu's alto asking short clipped questions. An hour passed as Mashu went back to her car once, to pull out a single small part and they replaced it while deep in their conversation.

"Alright, one of two things can happen here. This car will either start perfectly, or die a quick death and never start again." Mashu wiped her hands on a towel she'd brought along with her tools and parts. Placing the towel over her shoulder, Mashu folded her arms across her chest and waited as Mitsu got back inside the vehicle. The darker girl turned the key to the ignition and glanced towards the still open hood through the windshield. The engine revved for a second, and turned over. The Geo now sat, idling in the parking lot and drawing a few glances from passers by on the way to the recreation area on the horizon spanning lake not two hundred yards from where they stood.

"Woohooo!" Mitsu's small voice cheered as the car continued running. "Thanks Mashu. Now how to pay you back?"

"You can do that, by letting me follow you to the Circus tonight." Mashu smirked, an evil grin on her pale, lightly freckled face.

"What? Since when? That wasn't in the plans." Mitsu said, all but scratching her head in confusion.

"The Circus that's part of the Festival this week is advertising a tumbling act. I saw a poster earlier and could have sworn the star looked like your quarry. So when do we leave?"

Sanzo finally looked at the two girls, scowled one last time and sighed. Arms folded as he glared at both girls, with a cigarette smoldering between his lips. The ashtray in the front of the vehicle was already half full from the time he'd spent waiting, being bored.

Mitsu shrugged helplessly. "Looks like we're on our way downtown, Sanzo. That is, after we get you some cleaner clothes and some food for all of us." A grunt was the only answer from the blonde monk, glad to finally be on his way again, after all the delay, even though a frown still spread across his face.

"You're treating Mitsu!" the bespectacled strawberry blonde laughed.

"You bet I am." As the little guide fished out the Three Aspects Gold card given to her by Kozeon Boatzu, and waved it in Mashu's face with a grin.

After a few minutes of rushed planning the two cars pulled out of Lakeside Park, and made their way downtown. Following the mouth of the river south towards their goal, and the location of the next member to be retrieved.

_To Be Continued……… _

**Owari ;-) **

_Alias: _Looks to be interesting, how will Sanzo-sama handle this? I'm as curious as you are and I'm writing it! Two girls, and Lirin-chan in a circus, and our favorite grumpy monk without his weapon of choice. I should have this one up a lot sooner than 6 months this time! See ya then, that's if Nii Jyeni and Kougaiji don't take over my head again—or the rest of the cast.


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